Sooo…should we have a 2nd child? This is something we seem to go back and forth with.
Don’t just answer blindly. If you have or are expecting more than one, what made you decide to do it other than “you just wanted to” or “whoops, it accidentally happened.” I need good reasons with plans carefully laid out.
If you only have one, what made you decide to only have one child in your family?
We want Quinn to have a sibling here (she has a brother who lives in California but we’re not sure if they will ever spend much time together). It would be great for her to grow up in a home with a sibling: someone to learn with and from, someone to play with, someone to inspire, someone to play hide-and-seek with…
But, I also know how having siblings can be a bit of a letdown. I have two older half-brothers who I love and have wonderful memories with, but as adults, we barely know one another. It’s sad and honestly, a bit depressing. It’s hard to justify as an adult, even though I have so many wonderful memories as a child, how much my half brothers mean to me. But, at the end of the day, I have so many great memories and instances that make me who I am. All because of my brothers.
Jeremy doesn’t understand this. He sees a family that argues or misunderstands one another. He was an only child.
It’s easy to blame Jeremy for the lack of excitement of a sibling for Quinn, but to be honest, I have had ZERO desire to have another kid since she was born. She wasn’t a horrible newborn, but it wasn’t easy by any means. I always thought I wanted a million kids, but after Quinn was born, I just never had the desire again to go through it all again. There are a million different reasons why (our past pregnancy induduced mishaps) but in the end, if I REALLY wanted another kid, I would have overlooked all that (the fear of losing another pergnancy, the fear of having another baby with a severe birth defect because of my old age) - I know I sound paranoid but it’s happened in the past. It’s all just too hard.
Soooooo….basically I would LOVE to hear from anyone. Your opinion will not change a decision we have or have not made, but it will give us different options to think about. I am interested in all opinions: one kid, two kids, 5 kids…thanks in advance for your ideas, thoughts and making all our major life decisions for us…
And please don’t make it a public forum to argue. Every opinion is valid, I would love to hear them all.
Thanks in advance.
A mother of one and scared to go further.
