family of four

Well, here we are. Over a week into this two-kids thing, and so far, everyone is still alive. Success!

I have to say, I’m pretty surprised at how well it’s been going. I know that this is mainly due to the fact that we have 250% more help than we did the last time we had a newborn. And man, it’s been nice.

When Quinn was born, it was just Jeremy and I. We had no idea what we were doing and it seriously freaked us out. This time, my mom and Jeremy’s parents are all here to help. My mom has been staying with us and doing all the odds and ends around the house. She cleans, cooks, does laundry, runs to the grocery store for us and basically anything else we need. The woman never sits down. Jeremy’s parents have been bringing over dinners and helping with random daycare picks ups for Quinn when we can’t get out which is a huge help.

And having all of them around to shower Quinn with attention has been extremely helpful in easing her into this transition. She loves having a house full of people on the nights when everyone is over for dinner. And it’s been great to have extra hands around to look after Quinn or Ruby when our attention needs to be focused on just one of them.

But, none of this would have been half as easy as it’s been without Jeremy. He is amazing. He has really been looking after me the past week and making sure I’m taking all the time I need to rest and heal from childbirth. In the mornings, he lets me sleep in, he doesn’t let me lift a finger around the house, he takes Quinn out every single day and keeps her busy so that Ruby and I can rest, he even went to Target the other day to buy me gigantic maxi pads and more nursing tank tops. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is. He’s my hero.

All of this has made me feel extremely spoiled. To say I am grateful for all of the support is an understatement.

Here are a few other questions people have asked me since Ruby’s arrival:

How was this birth compared to the last?

I’m still trying to find time to write the birth story before it gets foggy. I’ll get to it eventually. But basically, in a nutshell, it was fast. I knew it would be, but it still took us by surprise. Luckily, I was able to have another unmedicated birth. But honestly, I wouldn’t have had time to get anything even if I wanted to because she was born about 10 minutes after I got to the hospital.

I feel extremely blessed that much like the entire pregnancy, I had absolutely zero complications this time. Basically, the contractions came, we got to the hospital, I pushed about 4 times and she was born perfectly healthy. I didn’t need anything, except six stitches and some Motrin afterwards.

When I tell people this, the first thing they ask is, “Oh, so it was a lot easier?”

No. No, it was not easier, just faster. Let me just clarify, that in no way was it easier. Except that this time, I didn’t need to push for three hours and I didn’t have a retained placenta. It was intense, crazy and hard as hell. And it hurt. There was absolutely nothing peaceful or serene about it. There was a lot of swearing, a lot of me saying, “No, I can’t do this. HELP me!” and as soon as she was born, I said how happy I was that I was never going to have to do that again.

The recovery this time has been ok. I am feeling much better this time around thanks to all the help and rest I’m able to get. But you just forget how much physical trauma your body goes through until you do it again. There’s non-stop bleeding, stitches (which I accidentally popped open 3 days after I was home), hemorrhoids, cracked nipples and tons of postpartum uterine contractions that are way stronger the second time around. Ha, other than that, everything is great!

What is Ruby’s personality like compared to Quinn’s?

So far, Ruby is every parent’s dream newborn baby: super-chill, super-sleepy and ridiculously sweet.

Ruby doesn’t cry much. If she does, it’s for about 5 seconds and it’s only right before I feed her. She loves to eat and as long as she is fed, she’s pretty happy. She doesn’t really fuss. I can put her in the swing, bouncy seat, car seat, etc. and she just hangs out. We can eat dinner as a family every night because she is happy to swing and nap while we eat. She doesn’t wake up crying. When I wake up at night to feed her, it’s not to the sounds of her screaming, but to her smacking her lips and making kitty cat sounds.

She loves to snuggle, loves to be swaddled and doesn’t even mind when Quinn screams in her face. In fact, I think she kind of likes it.

Everyone tells me that she is really too young to make any assumptions about her personality. I know in a week, she will wake up a bit more and some things will be different. But, I could tell Quinn’s personality from very early on and I can tell certain things about Ruby’s too. It’s not good or bad, just different.

I had a pretty hard time with the newborn phase when Quinn was born. I just couldn’t understand why parents loved it so much. After about 4 months, Quinn was a really good baby. But she was a pretty fussy newborn. She was spirited, just as she is now. She cried every time she would wake up- full-fledged, blood curdling cries. Waking up to someone screaming for over 6 months was beyond stressful.

Quinn wasn’t one of those babies that would sleep if I took her out. She would never nap anywhere except her crib or in the Bjorn. I couldn’t put her down anywhere or she would start fussing after 5 minutes. She was alert all the time, which was a blessing and a curse. I didn’t think much about all of these things at the time. I just chalked it up to normal, newborn territory and went into survival mode.

I’m not sure if Ruby’s personality is that much different than Quinn’s or if I just feel much more confident this time around. Either way it’s nice.

A friend at work said it perfectly when she said, “My second baby just spoke to me in a different way than my first.” And that’s exactly how I feel.

How is this newborn experience different from the last?

When Quinn was born, I had crazy, panicked thoughts of worry and anxiety. I couldn’t watch the news. I couldn’t even cross the street with her without thinking horrifying thoughts of all the bad things that could happen to us if a car came around the corner. The thoughts I had were very primal and scary.

I really haven’t had any of that this time around. I don’t bother with the news this time and most of my thoughts have remained pretty positive and humorous. Of course, I’ve had a few tearful, hormonal moments, usually when Quinn is having a bad day, or I’m tired, but for the most part, I feel really confident. Probably a little too confident. I know at some point, I am going to get my ass handed to me, and I’m ok with that. But for now, I’m just enjoying my blissful ignorance.

With Quinn, it took me about 6 weeks before I even realized I could place her on a blanket on the floor and walk away to use the bathroom and she would be fine until I got back. Now, I leave Ruby on the floor all the time to do random things. I bring her in bed with me in the mornings after Jeremy leaves so we can nap together. I never did that with Quinn. While I’m still mindful, I just have a lot less worry about everything.

Also, this time around, I am allowing myself the time I need to rest and heal from childbirth. When I was on maternity leave with Quinn, I felt like I constantly needed to be doing something to be a good mom. I was always running around, cleaning my house, going to Mom’s group meetings, taking her to new places all the time. I wasn’t resting at all and was totally focused on getting her to experience as much as she could in a short amount of time. I feel that because of this, my body took forever to heal and I was riddled with anxiety.

I know better now. I have no plans to do anything for the next 10.5 weeks other than soak up all the sweetness of this baby and rest as much as I can before I go back to work. I have zero guilt about it this time. I know how quickly it’s going to go by.

How are you all sleeping?

Knock on wood, but so far so good. The first few nights, she was up to eat every 1-2 hours which was hard. But lately, she’s been sleeping good 3-5 hour stretches at night.  The other night, I actually got 11 hours of sleep! It was broken up by three feedings, but still. I can’t remember the last time I got that much sleep. I know it was before Quinn was born. I think I might be the most well-rested new mom on the planet.

Again, I have to thank Jeremy and my Mom for this. They have been great about getting Quinn ready in the mornings and off to school or out of the house and busy on the days she is home. And Quinn usually sleeps pretty well through the night and doesn’t wake up until 7am, so I have to give her props as well. They all make it easier for me to rest.

How is Quinn handling her new role as a big sister?

Better than we thought, especially the last few days.

She was really excited the morning I was in labor that her baby sister was finally coming. She was great about seeing us in the hospital, and she was good the two days we were gone, thanks to her Grandparents.

When we got home, there was a bit of normal, three-year old fussiness. She was tired, overly-excited we were all home, and didn’t understand the whole nursing thing as well as I thought. There was a tinge of jealousy and she wanted to know why she couldn’t nurse too. She wanted more of my attention and it took her a while to understand why I couldn’t be as active with her, or why I was just sitting on a couch all day with a baby.

But just a few days later and she is doing great. She loves to sit with me and nurse her baby dolls while I nurse her sister. She can not walk by her sister without stopping to give her hugs and kisses and has gotten a little bit better about not trying to crush her head in the process. No real jealousy issues yet and we’re basically just trying to be patient as we teach her to be gentle with her affection.

I think a lot of the success so far has to do with their 3.5 year age difference. I can’t imagine trying to do this with Quinn a year ago. It would have been a whole different situation.

The other day, Ruby was fussing a tiny bit in the swing and Quinn walked over, sang her a lullaby (actually, she screamed it in her face) and rocked the swing (kind of hard) until Ruby fell asleep. It was kind of amazing to watch. Good thing this baby likes loud noises.

When will you start running again?

You know, if someone asked me this a few weeks ago, I would have said something stupid like, 3 weeks postpartum. But now I know that’s not going to happen. And because of the popped stitches, I don’t want to risk not healing properly, so I’m totally ok with waiting until my 6-week appointment to get the green light. I just want to make sure I don’t unnecessarily damage anything.

Although, after a week and half of lounging in the house, I am starting to feel a bit restless. And even though I have already lost 15lbs of the 25 I gained while pregnant, I am starting to feel kind of sluggish and out of shape. I think I will start some light weight lifting and walking/hiking during the day as soon as Ruby is big enough to fit in the carrier, probably in another week or so.

Thanks again to everyone for all the well-wishes, private messages, emails and good thoughts. We are still feeling so blessed and happy with our new normal. Everything seems to fit just right for some reason and we’re excited for this new journey together.

Weekend mornings nowadays. I could get used to this. Weekend mornings nowadays. I could get used to this. Weekend mornings nowadays. I could get used to this.

Weekend mornings nowadays. I could get used to this.

ruby james - day 1

Ruby’s first day, where she met her Mom, Dad, midwife Ronni, Big Sister Quinn, Grandma Diane, Grandma Andi and Grandpa Bud. 

It was a very good day.

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a summer day

Last week, I put down my iPhone and picked up my Canon, for the first time in a long time. 

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39 weeks

I promise that the belly photos are almost done.

Since I know at the most, I only have a couple of weeks left of ever experiencing this whole pregnancy thing, I’m indulging myself a little. Please bear with me.

And it seriously looks like I’m smuggling a basketball in the first picture. It’s almost comical.

Today, I’m 39 weeks, 3 days. Quinn arrived at 39 weeks, 5 days. It’s weird to think this is really about to happen. This whole pregnancy has flown by, even though I have been pregnant ALL year.  It’s surreal.

People keep asking us if we are ready. And the answer is yes. The nursery is done, the diapers are bought, the Grandparents are here to help with Quinn. I have finished all my jobs at work and organized the leftover stuff for coworkers while I am out. I’ve reread, or skimmed over, the good parts of some labor books, done a L&D tour of our new hospital and packed about 85% of my hospital bag. We’re ready.

But, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous.

I think most of it comes from knowing what to expect now. I don’t remember feeling like this last time. I’m nervous about the unknown of how and when I will go into labor. I am nervous about the labor itself. I’m nervous about the lack of sleep when baby comes home. Even though I’m barely sleeping now, so what difference does it make? I slept for 5 hours last night and that was a good night for me. It’s like I already have a newborn.

At the end of the day, I know it will all work out and we will survive just like we always do. I’m trying to just take some deep breaths and let it all fall into place as it will. No amount of worrying will change anything so I want to just enjoy these last few moments as a family of three with this sweet baby all to myself.

These days, I’m feeling ok. I am exhausted though, way more than I remember being at the end of my pregnancy with Quinn. I’m usually fine in the morning, but by mid-day, it’s painful how exhausted I become.

People keep telling me how small I am, which is a phrase no one has ever used to describe me in my life. Funny how it took getting pregnant for me to become “tiny”. Luckily, I really haven’t gained that much weight this time (23lbs total because I keep gaining and losing the same 2-4lbs every week), but I’m still really uncomfortable. Yesterday, I had intense sciatic pain which kept me in a hot shower for about 30 minutes. I’ve also had a ton of Braxton Hicks contractions, which are uncomfortable but not painful. And every time I eat, I feel like I’m going to explode.

Oh, and did I mention how hot I am all the time? it’s not even that hot out now, but I am always burning up. The thermostat is a constant source of struggle between me and Jeremy these days. He seems to think a setting of 76 degrees in August is cool enough. It’s not, by the way.

But the worst of it all is the insomnia. It’s so bad. It doesn’t matter how tired I am during the day, I can NOT fall asleep at night. And if I do, it’s that weird, light sleep where you are still aware of everything going on around you and you wake up constantly. It makes functioning during the day a joke.

I’m trying not to complain too much though. Things could be much worse. I’m so thankful that I have had a relatively easy pregnancy this time around and my baby girl seems to be thriving.

And the silver lining for today? My supervisors at work told me to work from home the rest of the week (Friday was to officially be may last day before maternity leave starts) so that I can rest. I guess it was kind of ambitious for me to assume my last day of work would be the day before I was due. But since it’s a desk job, I didn’t think much of it.

Honestly, I think they were all terrified of me going into labor at work. Trying to catch a train back home, then a 30 minute train ride and then another 30 minute ride to the hospital (with no traffic) would prove difficult.

So that’s that. Here I am. At home, with a light work load and not a thing to do to get ready for this little one to arrive. My mom even complained today that while I was at work, she couldn’t even find any laundry to do. Ha. I think we’re all set.

Which of course means this nugget will stay put for two more weeks…

Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too. Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too. Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too. Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too. Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too. Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.
But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.
"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"
At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.
I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.
So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.
And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.
At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.
It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too.

Last fall, a good friend gave me a generous gift certificate to a local salon for taking some family photos. I found the gift certificate in my drawer a few weeks ago, and figured it would be a perfect way to pamper myself for an afternoon right before the baby arrived.

But last week when I was making my relaxing appointment, something came over me.

"Do you happen to do kid’s nails, too?"

At the last second, I decided to make it a Mommy/Daughter date. Something to do together, just the two of us, to kind of celebrate her impending big sisterhood. I figured it would either be a really great idea, or a really bad one.

I told her last week we were going to go. She didn’t seem overly-excited which worried me a little bit. I usually paint her toenails, but have never allowed her to paint her fingernails because I said she had to be older. I told her that now, she is a big girl and could paint her fingers, too. That peaked her interest a little, but she was still hesitant.

So this morning I asked her again if she was sure she wanted to go with me or just stay home with Grandma. I figured if she really wasn’t into it, I wasn’t going to waste a relaxing afternoon to myself. She insisted she wanted to go, so off we went.

And honestly, it couldn’t have gone better. She was soooooooo good. I couldn’t believe it. She picked out her color (pink of course), and sat perfectly still while she got all painted up. Her mani-pedi lasted about 15 minutes total and she was a champ while mine took over an hour. She sat next to me, perfectly still as to not mess up her nails, and watched me get mine done. She ate a snack, asked lots of questions, and eventually, played a Dora game on my phone. She didn’t fuss at all and reveled in the fact that everyone that worked there told her what a good girl she was. I couldn’t have been more proud.

At the end, we sat under the dryers together (even though she was already dry) and she told me how much fun she was having. As we walked out and went to the local coffee shop to share a muffin, she stopped more than once to give me a giant hug and tell me how much she loved me.

It was a perfect morning. It’s not like we did anything spectacular, other than something new, just us two girls. But, It was exactly what I needed. And honestly, I think she needed it too.

Today, our tiny family doubled in size.
Jeremy’s parents finally arrived after a six-day drive across the country from California to Philadelphia. After Jeremy’s dad retired in June, they decided to pack up their lives and move out to Philadelphia. We’re so happy to finally have them here and are looking forward to having family close by again.
My mom also arrived from Florida for a 2-3 week stay in anticipation for Baby Sister’s arrival. We’re so excited she is here.
Quinn is over the moon to have both her Grandmothers here, her Grandpa Bud and Martha (their dog). She is getting more attention than she knows what to do with and Jeremy and I are so grateful for the extra help.
Yay family! Today, our tiny family doubled in size.
Jeremy’s parents finally arrived after a six-day drive across the country from California to Philadelphia. After Jeremy’s dad retired in June, they decided to pack up their lives and move out to Philadelphia. We’re so happy to finally have them here and are looking forward to having family close by again.
My mom also arrived from Florida for a 2-3 week stay in anticipation for Baby Sister’s arrival. We’re so excited she is here.
Quinn is over the moon to have both her Grandmothers here, her Grandpa Bud and Martha (their dog). She is getting more attention than she knows what to do with and Jeremy and I are so grateful for the extra help.
Yay family!

Today, our tiny family doubled in size.

Jeremy’s parents finally arrived after a six-day drive across the country from California to Philadelphia. After Jeremy’s dad retired in June, they decided to pack up their lives and move out to Philadelphia. We’re so happy to finally have them here and are looking forward to having family close by again.

My mom also arrived from Florida for a 2-3 week stay in anticipation for Baby Sister’s arrival. We’re so excited she is here.

Quinn is over the moon to have both her Grandmothers here, her Grandpa Bud and Martha (their dog). She is getting more attention than she knows what to do with and Jeremy and I are so grateful for the extra help.

Yay family!

dear quinn

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For the past three and a half years, this has been your space. Your modern-day scrapbook. Your little spot in world where we could document everything about you. Yes, there are written words about our family, and parenting and running. Sometimes I even write things that have very little to do with you. But at the end of the day, this space was, and is, inspired by you.

But soon enough, you will be sharing this space with a new little baby, much like you will be sharing everything else in your life: your home, your school, your toys, your parents. And when I think of it, I can’t help but feel a little sad.

The imminent arrival of your baby sister is slightly bittersweet. Of course, we are so eager to meet her, to have another little cuddly bundle added to our family. We are excited to learn about her personality and to see what she looks like. We wonder how her presence will change the dynamic and day-to-day schedules of our lives. Sometimes we worry a bit, but for the most part, we are delighted about the thoughts of all our new adventures together.

On the other hand, I have to admit, I have a bit of mourning to do over the “loss” of us - the three of us. It’s been you, me and your dad for three-and-a-half years now. We have our own routine, our own ways of loving one another, everything finally seemed to click with us and our new normal existed beautifully.

And then, we found out Baby Sister was coming.

And while we are excited about our newest addition, we can’t deny the fact that in gaining that we are losing something in the process.

I used to read stories about Mothers expecting a second child and wonder what all the fuss was about. Every single one of them would write with worries about how the first child would adjust to a new sibling. That she felt sorry for the first child because she wouldn’t be able to divide her attention properly. And every one would finish the worry with the same exact thought: how will my heart expand to love another child as much as I love my first?

“This is ridiculous.” I would complain as I read.

“What did you think would happen when you got pregnant again?”

Of course they will adjust.”

"Of course you will love them."

"Kids get siblings every day."

"Pregnant women worry about everything.”

Like most parenting issues, I didn’t get it until I was in the thick of it myself. Now I am here: a pregnant woman, worrying about everything. Mostly, I’m worrying about you. How you will adjust, how you will love your sibling, how we will find the time for you both, when some days, with both of us working full time, we barely have enough time to give just you.

My logic knows everything will be just fine. You are such a strong little girl, sweet, willful, adventurous and kind. When you are not acting like a 3-year-old deviant, your true personality shines through and it’s amazing to see. The person you are, the kindness in your heart, the sweetness of your personality, your empathy, I know you will relish your role as an older sister. And I can’t wait to witness it all and absorb it into my heart.

Over the past nine months, there have been moments when we are together where I will suddenly hold you tight and then whisper in your ear,

“Quinn, no matter what happens, you will always be my first baby girl. Forever and ever.”

Last night I went to whisper it to you, but you stopped me before I had a chance to finish the thought.

“I know Mommy. And you will always be my first Mommy.”

You don’t need the same reassurance that I do. You are stronger than I am in so many different ways. It was your own way of letting me know not to worry anymore. That everything was going to be ok. That possibly, you are more ready for the arrival of this precious baby than anyone else.

My dear baby girl, my daughter Quinn. You are a wise, old soul in a three-year old’s body. Thank you for making us a family and thank you for having the confidence in our family when my own confidence is in question.

I know you will never remember these years as our only child living under our roof, but your Daddy and I will hold these memories close to our hearts forever. The past three-and-a-half years, you have taught us more than we knew we needed to learn. And I’m confident, you will continue to teach us a thing or two once your sister decides it’s time to arrive.

You are going to be an amazing Big Sister. I know you will.

I love you forever, my first baby girl.

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Tonight, Quinn (who’s three in case anyone forgot) asked us to “pause” NBC Nightly News because she had to go to the bathroom and didn’t want to miss any of it. 

Um…ok?

buh-bye binky

After 3.5 years of soothing comfort, we (Jeremy and I) finally got brave and decided it was time to say goodbye to Binky.

I never intended for that piece of plastic to be in our lives for so long. I was pretty determined when she was a baby that we would not use a pacifier. But after a month of having a baby who constantly needed soothing from nursing, or sucking on our pinky fingers, I decided to give in. And it was great. I now know that a pacifier can be a wonderful thing – for babies.

But then a year turned into two and two turned into three. There was travel, visitors, sleep regressions and busy weekends. Then, there was a pregnancy. There was always an excuse.

Of course, in the back of my mind, I always intended to wean her off way before the baby came. But, have I mentioned how fast this pregnancy has gone by? We made all the typical excuses, “Well, she only uses it for sleep. We just gave up the nap, so we need one less thing to make her whiny during the day.” But suddenly, she started to regress a bit. Even though we never let her use it out in public, she always wanted it in the house. And she wanted it in the car. And God-forbid, one of her friends had one, then all hell would break loose.

Last week, I knew it was time to stop the excuses.

Most people told us to just throw them away, or clip them. These ideas seemed logical to me. I’m not really a “coddle-and-make-up-stories–to-make-them-feel-better” type of Mom. But, I was also afraid that at this point, since we had waited so long, it was a little mean to just dump them. I knew it would be hard for her, so we decided the “Binky Fairy” route would be a good way to go.

Luckily, we had been talking to her for months about how one day the Binky Fairy was going to come and collect the binkies to give them to little babies who needed them. We read her a few books on the subject. She understood and seemed ok with it. We also told her that maybe the Fairy would leave her a “big-girl” gift for being so brave. Of course she was ok with that.

For her 3rd birthday, we bought her a Strider bike, but since she had already received so many other gifts from friends and family, we figured it would be a good gift in exchange for the Binky. So we hid the box in the basement, with the full intention of her having it within a month. And as more excuses piled up, we kind of forgot about it. Until last week.

After another busy weekend, we decided to just go for it last Monday and deal with the consequences. I wasn’t getting any sleep anyway, so if she was up all night, for me, it wouldn’t make a difference.

In the car on Sunday night, I told her I got an email from the Binky Fairy on my phone that said she had heard Quinn was a big girl now and she was coming to our house the next night to collect Binkies for new babies in the world. And if Quinn was brave enough to leave her Binkies in a box, she would leave her a big-girl gift in exchange.

Quinn was excited. She asked me to read the email again from my phone. Jeremy laughed at me as I tried to re-read the imaginary email verbatim.

The first thing I did Monday morning while she was downstairs was collect our two final binkies and cut the tips off. I knew this would be a good first step to help her understand what was about to happen. As we were about to leave to go to school, she went in her room to grab a binky for the car. A few minutes later, I saw her silently sobbing on the stairs.

“What’s wrong honey?”

“DADDY BROKE MY BIIIIINKY!!!!!”

Ha! Dad automatically gets blamed. Jeremy shot me a glare. He didn’t even know I was going to clip them.

I sat with her and told her that the day the Binky Fairy comes, the tips automatically fall off so the Binkies will be ready for new babies. She was annoyed but shoved the destroyed binky in her mouth anyway.

On the way to school, she kept trying to gnaw on it, but of course, it wasn’t working. After a few minutes, the binky came flying across the car. She didn’t want it anymore and didn’t ask for it again the entire day.

That night, she seemed totally ok with everything. She was actually really good all evening and even told her friends that she had to go home early because the Binky Fairy was coming to her house. Before bedtime, we found a little box and placed the last two clipped binkies inside of it. I asked her if she wanted to say goodbye to them before going to bed. “Nope.” She said as she headed up the stairs to her room.

“Wow, that was easy.” I thought.

We did our normal bath and story routine. She was fine. Then, we laid there to sing a song and that’s when the reality of the situation hit.

I don’t know if they make Binky Methodone, but someone should start a lab. The poor kid looked like she wasn’t going to make it. She was whining , and screaming and thrashing her legs. She was begging for Daddy to come back in the room and “Bring me my BIIIIIINKKKKY!!!!”

I stayed calm and held her. I kept singing our normal songs. I told her what a good girl she was being and how brave she was. Jeremy came up and held her for a bit. I considered just letting her have one more night with a clipped binky before I changed my mind. No point in giving her a crutch. All-or-nothing. So, I held out.

This sad, pathetic display lasted for about an hour. As I thought about the fact that she hadn’t fallen asleep without a pacifier since she was 3 weeks old, I started to feel really bad for her. So, I stayed with her and remained patient and kind, no matter how many times she flailed around and tried to get out of bed.

I knew she was getting tired because she kept yawning. And finally she told me I could leave the room. She only says this if she’s really tired and can’t fall asleep. I gave her a kiss and walked into our bedroom to talk to Jeremy who was pouting on our bed.

“It’s going to be a long night.” I said.

“I feel awful. I just don’t understand why we have to take it from her. It seems so mean.” He said.

Jeremy is such a good Dad. I told him this. I also told him that it’s not her oxygen supply, it’s a bad habit. And she does need help to break it. Three-year olds aren’t great at making logical life decisions for themselves. He agreed.

When our conversation was done, we realized that she was asleep. We were relieved, but fully-knew she would be up later in the night.

But to our surprise, she didn’t wake up until morning.

The next day, as I was in the shower, I heard her call from downstairs,

“MOMMY! THE BINKY FAIRY LEFT ME A NEW PINK BIKE!”

After she fell asleep, I brought up the pink bike and placed it by the box of binkies. Then, I threw the binkies in the bottom of the garbage can (to hide them from both her and Jeremy) and wrote her a colorful note with markers from the Binky Fairy, thanking her and congratulating her on becoming a big girl.

She loved the bike and the note. We kept telling her how proud we were of her and she agreed. She was stoked.

That day, she was restless, but didn’t ask for the Binky and at night, she fell right to sleep. The next two nights, she was up a bit longer, but that’s mostly because she naps at school. Since then, she’s definitely been a bit more of a handful, but I’m not sure if it’s any different than any of her other normal 3-year-old phases of defiance. She has maybe mentioned Binky a few times, but I just pretend like I don’t hear her and she drops the subject. 

So, that’s it. Looks like Binky is out of our house – at least for the next couple of weeks, till my next little junkie joins us. It was a lot less horrible than we thought it would be. It’s funny how we anticipate the worst in our kids sometimes when they really give us no reason to. Lets just hope that in a few weeks, I won’t see her snatching the binky from Baby Sister’s mouth.

See? Anticipating the worst already.

Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt. Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.
But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!
So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?
It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt.

Somehow, I managed to catch another stomach bug or something yesterday and was up until almost 3:30am as night as sick as a dog. I spent all day feeling miserable and trying to figure out if what I was feeling was just from being sick, or me going into labor (I’m about 95% confident, I’m just sick). Either way, ugh. I feel awful.

But, after Jeremy was nice enough to spend the entire morning with Quinn so I could rest, and then offered to take her out in the afternoon so I could rest some more, I couldn’t resist spending some time outside on such a beautiful summer day in Philly. Sunny and 80 degrees? In August? Yes, please!

So, we decided to take an easy drive down around the art museum where we slowly wandered around for a bit. Eventually, we needed a bathroom break, so we dodged into the Academy of Natural Sciences for short visit. Jeremy takes Quinn a lot, thanks to a membership our friends Lori and Emi bought for us (thanks guys!), but I had never been. So, while we really just stopped into use the restrooms, Quinn wanted to show me the dinosaurs and butterflies. How could I refuse?

It was such a beautiful afternoon in the city with my little family. Even if I felt like butt.

I love this so much.

I have never once talked about my weight, my daughter’s weight or anyone else’s weight in front of my daughter. If she sees me jump on the scale and wants to do it herself, I tell her how proud I am that she is growing.

I tell her all the time how strong she is. And that I run because it makes me feel good and it’s fun. I never tell her I’m not eating something. We eat healthy and we eat treats. We try not to indulge too much in our house and we just don’t buy a lot of prepackaged junk food, soda, etc. Sometimes we will cut back on certain things, but we just don’t talk about it.

I know there will come a day where my daughter will look at herself in the mirror and not be happy with who she sees looking back at her. I think it happens to everyone (male and female) and it breaks my heart to think of it happening to her. I just hope that I can instill a little voice in the back of her head that quiets the other voices and can add bit of common sense to her self-doubt.

And if I ever hear her making fun of someone else for how they look, she is in serious trouble.

introducing - our baby

So, instead of doing work for the last 10 minutes, I decided to see what this baby in my belly is going to look like. I did this when I was pregnant with Quinn by using the website morphthing.

You upload a front-facing photo of yourself, or anyone, and then morph it with photos of celebrities on the site or other photos you upload. It’s a fun way to waste a few minutes and I was kind of surprised at how much the baby this site came up with ended up actually kind of looking like Quinn after she was born. 

Anyway, introducing Baby Sister (although, she looks more like a toddler in this photo).

Me

Plus Jeremy

Equals - Super-cute kiddo!

It looks like we’ve got ourselves a brown-eyed baby this time! Not sure where all that blonde hair is coming from, though.

37 weeks. aka - full term

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This past Saturday, I reached 37 weeks.

Officially full-term. Holy when-did-that-happen?

I’ve also officially reached the end of my energy supplies. I’m exhausted and feeling VERY pregnant of all of the sudden. I don’t remember feeling quite this tired at the end when I was pregnant with Quinn. Maybe it was because I was pregnant in the middle of the winter. Now, between the summer heat, pregnancy-induced insomnia and trying to keep up with a 3.5 year old, I’m constantly worn down.

Quinn is 3, so more days than not, she is a handful. She always means well, but it’s still a struggle to just get her to listen to anything we ask and the constant back and forth and frustrations on both ends are exasperating for all of us. Most days, I just don’t have the energy to argue with her.

The day after my last post about running, I went out for a 3 mile run. I got to 2.25 and decided to call it a day. I walked for about another half mile before heading home. I was just tired and not feeling it. I was finally starting to feel some soreness under my belly, which I hadn’t felt until then, so I figured another mile wasn’t worth being uncomfortable for the rest of the day. I think my days of running are definitely on hold for a few weeks, and I’m totally ok with that.

Yesterday, Jeremy, Quinn and I went for a 3.5 mile walk down by the Wissahickon Creek and the last mile, I thought I was going to die from sheer exhaustion. People always ask me how I run while pregnant, but honestly, walking seems way more difficult. I have no idea why. I was completely spent for the rest of the day and had zero energy.

So now, I think I’ve finally reached a point where I’m ok with just taking it easy and resting as much as possible. I have tried to stay active for so long just because I sit so much at work all the time, that when I’m home, I want to move. But now, I don’t. All I want to do it lie down, conserve my energy and wait for this baby to get here.

Luckily, we are technically ready. The nursery is complete (I should find some energy to take pictures of that). I even bought a few diapers and wipes. My FMLA paperwork is in, I’m finishing up some bigger jobs at work and I met with my boss last week to go over all the open jobs I have and where the files are. Other than a couple of other insurance/HR phone calls, I think we are all set.

Quinn still seems fairly excited. We hung out with our friends Lori, Emi, Mia and Baby Seth last night and she LOVED sitting on the couch and holding Seth. Hopefully, the novelty of the situation won’t wear off too quickly for her once her sister arrives.

Jeremy and I go back and forth. One day, he is the confident one, assuring me I have nothing to worry about and everything is going to be fine once the baby gets here and the next day, our roles are reversed. I think it’s safe to say, we are both excited, definitely happy, and counting our blessings. But still, we are nervous and scared. In a few weeks, our entire lives are going to be turned upside down and no matter how confident we act, it is freaking us out a little bit. We know this is normal, so we just go with it and try not to let it take over while we just focus on how lucky we are to have a healthy baby.

She will be here so soon. I’m anxiously awaiting the day my body tells me it’s go-time. Some days I get super-nervous about going through labor again, and others, I get really excited. I know it sounds weird, but it really is such an amazing, life-changing experience. And since it will be my last, I want to try to “enjoy” the process as much as I can.  I’m doing my best to wrap my head around it all again without freaking myself out.

It seems like every woman I know is telling me tales of how early she went in her labor – days, weeks, etc. It seems like every friend or celebrity who I was pregnant with now has a baby (congratulations to Quinn’s Godparents, Marissa and Kevin who gave birth to their first baby today - due five days before us!). Looks like we’re next. I can’t believe how fast it’s all flown by.

Maybe I should pack a hospital bag or something?